Ted Cruz Just Outdid Ted Stevens For The Dumbest Thing A Politician Has Ever Said About The Internet

President Obama came out in favor of net neutrality this week, saying that the FCC should reclassify the Internet as a public utility. While Obama has no more official influence over the FCC than you or I, this would keep internet providers from being able to speed up or slow down your internet service to certain sites, or to charge more for “fast lanes.” Basically, the idea would be to keep the internet the way it is now, without allowing the cable companies, which are already a de facto monopoly, to control the speed of the internet to sites you want to access. While it’s not quite as good as making net neutrality the law, at least it was something. Lip service, maybe, but at least it was good lip service.

Still, political parties have to oppose everything the other side does, leading Texas Senator (and likely 2016 presidential candidate) Ted Cruz to tweet quite possibly the dumbest statement a politician has made about the internet since that other Senator Ted (Stevens, of Alaska) called it “a series of tubes” back in 2006.

That’s right, the idea that service providers shouldn’t be able to favor their partner companies is somehow “the speed of government.” Don’t waste any time trying to figure out what that means, you will be much dumber for it. God help us if our internet ever operates at the stupidity of politicians. The ones and zeros would start arguing with each other over who was tougher on Ebola and your YouTube videos would buffer for the entire month of August.

UPDATE: As Gizmodo points out, Ted Cruz (along with a ton of other Senators in both parties who have received money from cable companies), has received $47,000 in donations from the major cable providers.

×