A Florida Man Shot His Sister In The Butt Over A Penis-Shaped Birthday Cake

A Holly Hill, Florida, man — 21-year-old Christopher Taft — was arrested on battery charges last Sunday for shooting his sister in the ass with a BB gun. What slight could she have possibly committed to warrant such an act? Oh, just thoughtfully baking her brother a birthday cake… shaped like a penis. FLORIDA, YOU’VE DONE IT AGAIN.

Click Orlando wrote:

Taft told police he thought it would be funny to shoot his sister with a BB gun as a joke and did not intend to hurt her, according to the report.

The BB was embedded in the victim’s skin and she refused to be transported, saying she would go to a hospital herself, police said. The victim told police she didn’t want to pursue criminal charges.

For once, I’m at a complete and total loss for words, so I’m just going to let South Park sum this up for me:

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