An Oregon Man Writes A Letter Asking His City To Ban The Smell Of Farts

05.27.15 2 years ago
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Much to the delight of some Dave Matthews Band fans, the legalization of recreational marijuana use is occurring all over the U.S. This recent love of the sticky icky, though, has not stopped certain bodies of government from hassling law abiding smokers. One such case of this is occurring in the town of Pendleton, Oregon, where a recently passed ordinance is causing a stink. The law states that if the smell of marijuana is detected by a neighbor, a fine of up to $500 can be levied on the smoker.

Pendleton resident Peter Walters found the whole smell ordinance to be kind of a buzzkill. He decided that enough was enough, and penned a wonderfully snarky letter to the East Oregonian, entitled, “Farts should be Pendleton council’s next order of business.” The real intent of the letter was to show the absurdity of the new law, and not to actually ban the stink of butt burps. Here is a brief excerpt:

It was with great relief Thursday when I read in the East Oregonian that Pendleton’s city council took the time to pass an amendment to the city’s nuisance ordinance banning marijuana odor. Clearly, there has been no issue of greater importance facing the city. Now that this important work has been completed I hope that the council will move on to restricting the other offensive smell that plagues our community: farts.

While farting may be legal in Oregon, many (including myself) are offended by the flatulent stench. Too often, homeowners and businesses fail to contain farts to their property, forcing the rest of us to put up with the smell. Some habitual farters argue that they need to fart for medical reasons but that doesn’t mean my kids should have to smell their farts. The city council should stop looking the other way and pretending not to notice.

Hats off to Peter for putting down the Funyuns, turning off Half Baked, and somehow finding the motivation deep inside to write such an entertaining letter.

(Via: Death and Taxes)

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