KSK Mock Draft: Fictional Vacation Land

03.08.13 5 years ago 103 Comments

This week we are drafting a fictional realm where we would want to vacation. The inspiration comes via Zack, master of draft idea submissions. His suggestion was for a fictional realm to live in, but that seemed too permanent. So we’re going with vacation destinations instead. Anything from the fictional world is fair game, including film, television, novels or got dang vidya games. But it has to be fictional. No vacationing in the a distopian Los Angeles circa 2019, because we already did the Blade Runner thing last week.

1. Ape – Sextillion

That link is NSFW. So is this one. Don’t click on them unless your boss is in to illustrated porn.

Since I’ve been reading the comic Saga, Sextillion sounds fun, so long as I don’t get steered toward any child prostitutes. Or those dude pyramid rooms.

2. Sarah – Themyscira

Artist’s rendering.

Wonder Woman’s (and the rest of the Amazons) home. While there you take on the abilities to learn things pretty fast, stronger physical abilities, come back from the dead.

Plus, fantasy places tend to be pretty rough on women so this seems the safest of them.

/Worried Ape would take Themyscira for his own sick reasons.

3. CC – Zeltros from the Star Wars realm

An opulent world, hedonism was the doctrine encouraged by the empathetic Zeltrons, and Zeltros was continuously in a state of never ending revelry. The Zeltron appreciation of beauty in its many forms led to luxurious art and architecture covering the world, and the galaxy’s most wealthy favored Zeltros as a vacation destination. Many who came to the planet were taken in by the celebratory atmosphere and the powerful pheromones of the Zeltron people to the point they found it difficult to leave, and even planetary invasions often floundered in the face of Zeltros’ planet-wide festivities.

It’s like New Orleans minus the humidity and flooding.

4. Flubby – Bedrock

I’ve always wanted to go to the Water Buffalo Lodge.

5. UM – Shangri-La

Synonymous with an earthly paradise. Exotic and relaxing make for a good vacation.

First round recap: There are some serious Sci-Fi and comic book fans among us who know a hell of a lot more about awesome fantasy shit than I do. Ape is one of them, and he wastes little time going for a sex-cation. Matt is pissed because he had the same pick ready to go. Fortunately it’s a deep draft. Sarah is a girl so she picks some dumb girl thing, then Matt lands a great sounding pick by googling “vacation planet.” Flubby joked about picking a locale from Plato’s Republic. While I doubted anyone would take Kallipolis, I figured somebody would surely go for Atlantis with an early pick. No dice. Plato gets shut out. I wrapped up the first round with a pretty obvious pick because I lack creativity. That will come back to haunt me.

6. UM – Santraginus V

Santraginus V is the fifth planet from the Santraginus star. It is home to beautiful marble-sanded beaches, beautiful sea-water (which is part of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster) beautiful sea-fish, and beautiful seashells. A performer of the Disaster Area band went here on a holiday, and stayed there forever, making friends with a rock.

I’m not much for Sci-Fi, but I do enjoy Hitchhiker’s, and I’ve always wanted a rock for a friend.

7. Flubby – Ducksburg

In lieu of commentary we’ll go straight to the (240p) video tape.

8. CC – Pangu

Whore Island!

9. – Judgement City from Defending Your Life

The best food you’ve ever had and you can eat all you want? Past Lives Pavilion? Yes, please.

10. – Imaginationland

Second round recap: Where I’m going I will definitely need a towel. But will Flubby? If one goes swimming in a money vault does one get wet? Regardless, I was devastated by Matt’s pick. Part of me always hoped that Pangu was real. Still, that was nothing compared to Sarah’s pick.

I love Defending Your Life, and it never even occurred to me. Granted, you have to die to get to Judgement City, and once there you have to endure an excruciating judgement. Sure, you could be looking at only a few days filled with heroic acts like Julie, but mine would be much more like Daniel’s. 15 days of hell (and pie). But it would all be worth it to taste those eggs. I will now force myself to stop talking about Defending Your Life.

Ape finishes things off with Imaginationland, which I never thought would go before Toon Town, but what the hell.

Make your picks in the comments. I’m sure 10% of them will make me want to bang my head on a desk for passing it up.

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