The Manning Family Gets Double Stuffed, Eli Licks Up the Cream

01.14.08 10 years ago 19 Comments

Is it possible that the Manning family is growing tired of all this football business? Well now that Eli has overtaken Peyton as the dominant brother under center the whole family is poised for a move in a whole new direction.

So what could this second sport be? The obvious answer would be squash, but that would hardly help to reestablish Peyton as the family alpha dog. Here’s a clue to get you started…

DSRL you say? It sounds like some sort of brand new learning disability that only exists within the mushy brains of children reared by first cousins. Peyton and Eli certainly are the ideal posterboys for such an affliction, but no. Yet the truth is even sadder…


Yep, the entire Manning family has signed on for another endorsement deal. It’s about fucking time! There are only so many times (1,674 to be exact) that I can watch Peyton’s Priceless Peptalks on my DVR. Now I get to look forward to a whole ad campaign centering around the idea of the Manning brothers racing to lick the cream out of cookies at breakneck speed. The best news of all is that you get to participate as well!

Sign up for the contest through the Nabisco website and you could find yourself in a stadium with a guest of your choosing along with the Manning family and an the official Oreo Mascot!

The winner and his or her guest will get to engage in a licking contest of their own with the dynamic pitchmen. If you’re lucky enough to beat Peyton and Eli you’ll qualify for the grand prize! Sit back and watch as the brothers give the old “double-stuff” treatment to lovely Olivia while you lick up all the tangy cream that runs down her leg.

Enjoy your breakfast everyone, and remember to eat your Oreos!

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