Meet The Teenager Who Got Busted Stealing ‘Rock Hard Erection Cream’ And ‘Deep Throat Desensitizing Spray’

This Spartanburg, South Carolina woman might be a contender for the most embarrassing shoplifting arrest ever. Last week eighteen-year-old Karla Farmer was busted at Spartanburg’s WestGate Mall for stealing some interesting items from Spencer’s. You know, just your household staples: Rock Hard Erection Cream, Deep Throat Desensitizing Spray, and a pair of handcuffs.

Karla Farmer first swiped the cream and spray from the “love unit” of a Spencer’s store, according to a police report. After exiting the business, she returned a few minutes later to nick the handcuffs, investigators allege.

When police searched Farmer’s purse, they recovered the Spencer’s merchandise, as well as a bra and two pairs of underwear apparently stolen from a Victoria’s Secret location in the WestGate mall in Spartanburg.

You know that saying about never returning to the scene of the crime? There’s a reason why that’s a saying. Don’t return to the scene of the crime, especially to commit more crimes. You will get caught.

Anyway. It’s unclear whether or not this was part of some kind of prank — after all, at eighteen, Farmer may very well be a college freshman. Who hasn’t stolen something embarrassing for fun at some point in their college career? *cough* But it’s just as likely that some eighteen-year-old boy was VERY DISAPPOINTED when his date never showed last week. More than he’ll ever know.

(The Smoking Gun via NY Daily News)

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