Tighten the tin foil hats, folks, because we’ve got a hot, new conspiracy theory for you involving the crisp cash that’s tucked neatly in a wallet under your butt cheek. According to a guy on the Internet – which is typically a qualifier for being a foremost authority – our American paper monies have the capability of predicting terrorist acts and natural disasters… but only if you fold them correctly.
In fact, in order to reveal the dark, hideous truth of this world’s future, you need only to fold a bill sort of like a paper airplane, and it will predict a major catastrophic event that will devastate someone somewhere. So far, this gentleman claims to have used various bills to predict the Oklahoma City bombing, the attacks on the World Trade Center on 9/11 and the attack on the Pentagon.
Now, he claims, the new $100 bill that I hope to one day have two or three of predicts that nuclear missiles will strike New York City and cause a massive tidal wave that will look a lot like that scene from The Day After Tomorrow. It’s pretty terrifying stuff, folks. Especially the grainy video footage. It’s called High Definition, you whackos.