Only The Arena League Will Have Tebow

03.18.13 5 years ago 28 Comments

One of the biggest stories of the 2012 off-season was Tim Tebow being displaced as the starting quarterback of the Denver Broncos after derping his way into the second round of the playoffs and the hearts of millions of Jesus freaks the season before. Yet here we are, one year later, and no one outside of ESPN can muster any patience or interest in the fate of the Runslinger, after his endlessly hyped arrival in New York resulted in him mostly sitting on the bench.

So wearied are we by the discussion of Teebs that it almost brings us no joy to learn that the only team still interested in acquiring Tebow’s services as a football player (he’ll make a fine evangelist one day) is the Orlando Predators of the Arena League. The Predators’ owner, Brett Bouchy, explained to the Orlando Sentinel how the Arena League has helped other struggling Jesus-y quarterbacks like Kurt Warner find their game and could do the same for Timmy. In fact, his team would be glad to help. I think we all know that’s mostly bullsh*t and that Bouchy is more interested in reaping the instant windfall that comes with catering to locals and Bible-thumpers eager to watch Tebow on bended knee on a football field. You know what? That’s just fine by us. If you making your money also gets Tebow out of the NFL, more power to you. Get that money, Brett Bouchy.

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