Other Pointless NFL Jobs Besides Raiders PR: Trimming The Fat

06.03.13 4 years ago 41 Comments

wasting money

The Raiders fired or murdered there PR Director or VP Zak Gilbert or whatever this weekend and I’m not sure why we’re supposed to care anymore, much less be suprised when the Raiders do something that 2 dozen college educated journalists disagree with. My big question= why would the Raider’s even have a PR guy to begin with.(?) Its not like the Titans pay a full-time key to the city maker for Kenny Britt just in case.

Even our professional sport’s leagues are not unaffected by this double-dip recession and since cities are refusing to help with building awesome new stadiums, franchises need to cut back where they can or risk financial collapse. I took along look at payrolls around the league and found a bunch of wasteful jobs that are just bleeding money. The following jobs are useless and need to be eliminated:

-Owners suite Big+Tall store manager at FedEx Field

-Bengals team chaplain

-Guy who would refill the hand sanitizer at Falcons games

-After Obamacare the Jets no longer have a legal responsibility to pay Sanchezes Plan Parenthood franchise fees (no comment from Florio as of Presstime)

-The entire Raiders front office when you can just pay a immigrant to hose down the ouiji board once a week no offense

-Cancel Law&Order SVU: Big Ben,, lesson learned no need to show him up

-Bills QB coach

-Bear’s DBs spend a awful lot on coat hangers not sure what thats about but cut it in half

-Panthers Hawain airlines ticket broker

-Senior Director of Diet Cola, Lambeau

-Guy who has to change the “0 days w/out a DUI” sign outside Alec Ogletrees house once a month

-VP of Battery Replacement for Jahvid Bests “Simon Says” console

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