Shanny Takes a Shine to Lindsay, Danny Doesn’t Deign to Speak

01.06.10 8 years ago 17 Comments

Dan Snyder landed himself a marquee coach to go with his new GM, and the trio was out celebrating last night. It wasn’t long before the local media showed up to greet the new coach (just like last time) with cameras rolling. That means it’s time for another edition of the “Inside a Tailgate Classy Steak Dinner” series.

0:01 – Ooh, The Palm. It’s the place to see and be seen. I hope Mr. Snyder remembered his 837 card.

0:03 – Shanny isn’t going to be letting go of Lindsay Czarniak‘s hand any time soon.

0:14 – “Nice to meet you. Channel 4, right? Okay, we’ll talk.” [smiles lecherously]

0:17 – Whoa, get a load of this big ginger. Okay, enough of that, back to the blond.

0:25 – Condescending pat on the arm.

0:26 – “Oh man, you’re good. You are good.” What do you say the two of us get out of here? Maybe go find a nice private spot.

0:27 – Outta the way, Feldman.

0:40 – Inaudible dialogue from Shanny. I’ll just assume he said “I gotta take you home with me.”

0:50 – Oooh, look at them eating! Alright, this is a bit creepy.

1:03 – Of course they’re at the McLean location. Snyder probably wishes he could change the team’s name to the Metro Area Redskins. We’re never getting a DC stadium.

1:04 – Here Lindsay, let me get that door for you.

1:07 – He didn’t even try to glance at Lindsay’s ass. What self control.

1:08 – Oh great, this Feldman guy expects me to hold the door for him too.

1:12 – Christ, I’m gonna be here all night.

1:26 – Where the hell does Danny find all of his team-colored clothing? He must have his own sweatshop that churns out ten burgundy and gold ties an hour.

1:27 – Dan Snyder leads the league in both dickishness. He’s second to Todd Haley in dismissive hand gestures.

1:35 – Jesus Christ, Bruce, get in the fucking car!

1:42 – At this point Snyder realizes that the man he hired to oversee the salary cap is incapable of moving a seat.

1:54 – “It’s this new technology.” Damn American cars and their cutting edge technological advancements. Just pull the fucking lever for him, Kiersten!

1:58 – Lindsay should really tell Snyder to shove that thumb up his ass.

2:14 – Turn on that dome light so they can see how happy we are!

2:15 – And there you have it. The guys with the real power sit in the captain’s chairs while the GM is relegated to the back row. Although that’s not how it played out this afternoon.

If you look closely you can see Vinny Cerrato holding on to the undercarriage. Here’s to hoping they take the shortcut through the cactus patch on their way back to Ashburn.

Video via NBC Washington

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