Snowpiercer Has A Release Date; Hold All My Calls

If I recall correctly, the “…And Then They Get Schwarma” scene at the end of The Avengers was shot only a few days before it was released in theaters. Chris Evans spent that scene with his face away from the camera, because at the time he was filming Snowpiercer, and had a beard that could not be removed, not even for Captain America and The Avengers, and if an important beard doesn’t make you want to see Snowpiercer, we have dissimilar interests and should probably not spend long car rides together.

To recap the drama surrounding Snowpiercer: Bong Joon-ho, the South Korean director behind The Host, released his first English-language film in his home country last August. The Weinstein Company snapped up distribution rights and then started complaining about the length of the movie. It released last year in other non-English speaking countries (including France, since it is based on a French graphic novel,) but finally, Harvey Weinstein has agreed to release Joon-ho’s original cut of the film in the U.S. on June 27th — at the same time as the next Transformers movie, and still only in limited release.

So, basically, expect this movie to be a hella good RedBox rental.

Snowpiercer is the story of an accidental apocalyptic ice age, and the train that the remains of human society live on. The train pierces snow. It’s called Snowpiercer. That’s really all I needed to know to want to see this thing, but also: Chris Evans in a beard and Tilda Swinton looking as batsh*t crazy as we all know her to be.

I now look forward to the paltry five-city roll-out the Weinsteins are no doubt going to do, and then in three years people asking why the hell they never saw this Snowpiercer thing that’s on Netflix when it was in theaters.

(Apparently people at the back of the snow piercing mega train don’t get equal access to showers and Lava soap. I’d revolt, too.)

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