Move over American Sniper, there’s a new fake baby in town. Who’s the new diaper-wearing kid on the block? Simon Philion‘s Cool Baby, that’s who. According to the adorable little devil’s Kickstarter page, ‘The Cool Baby” is
An expressive, customizable, hands-free beverage insulator that looks like a baby. Drinking in public is now adorable.
It’s exactly what it sounds like. Philion has created a masterwork of bro ingenuity, a public means of drinking alcohol of any form, shape, and size — so long as it fits within the Cool Baby’s 36-ounce bladder. So whether you’re looking for an easy way to transport cheap booze into a ballgame, or need something to help you between bars on a bar crawl, the Cool Baby is your baby.
However, if your skin complexion doesn’t match Philion’s prototype, it’s not because the baby-maker has run out on you.
Because of lack of resources in this first round, you’re going to be seeing a lot of sleeping, caucasian babies. After this thing is funded and I get a factory re-tooled and working with me, I’ll have all different kinds of baby races, baby dispositions, baby sexual orientations, and baby IQ’s. Sky’s the limit. Anything you ever wanted out of your progeny.
As of this writing, 236 backers have pledged $12,847 to Philion’s fundraising goal of $70,000. The final product is due sometime in August 2015.
In the meantime, maybe Philion could explain the origin of this horrifying image: