Us humans, we’ve had a good run. Done some things, seen some things, made Zen Arcade. Our string of success tops even what the Atlanta Braves did in the NL East in the 1990s/early 2000s. But it’s time for us to step down; there’s a new boss in town: snakes, now that they can OPEN F*CKING DOORS. EVERYONE PANIC.
That sound of a no-leg slapping into the floor is the last thing we’ll ever hear.