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Dirk Gets A Hero’s Welcome Home; Ray Felton Ready To Hit Portland

Was Scottie Pippen jilted? Why is he STILL leaking Money from his mouth? It wasn’t too long ago that MJ was personally thanking Scottie during his now infamous Hall of Fame roast. But now Pippen is on a personal mission: unleash all Hell on Jordan’s name. His latest offering comes from the New York Daily News, who quoted Pippen saying, “He doesn’t have a clue” after Jordan’s latest draft picks of Kemba Walker and Bismack Biyombo. Um, we’re right with you Pip, but you didn’t exactly use the best examples. We actually think Mike made it out of this draft alive … Biyombo is dealing with his own problem. His Spanish club, Fuenlabrada, says he is still under contract and needs a buyout in order to play in the NBA. Biyombo says he was a “free agent.” Everything about this guy is a mystery. Even his own team doesn’t know whether he was actually on the squad or not. Soon, we’ll find out he’s actually Captain Monroe Kelly from the movie “Congo” disguised as a basketball player … In another potentially landscape-and-championship-reshaping move, Aaron Gray will follow his teammate David West and become a free agent … Raymond Felton said he wants to start something long-term in Portland. Just realizing he’s still only 27 years old (he seems older for some reason), and is coming off maybe the best season of his career, Portland is probably hyped to hear that…as are we. It’s a good fit. It might take Felton a little while to get used to the Blazers slowed-down tempo, but if Andre Miller can do it (who ironically, LOVES playing w/ uptempo teams) so can Felton. At a minimum, he can help open up the paint for LaMarcus Aldridge and Gerald Wallace to go to work … And in what had to be one of the more awkward conversations in the history of the NBA, Miller told the Denver Post this past Sunday was the first time since the Nuggets shipped him out in December of 2006 that he talked to George Karl. Ummm…that’s just crazy. He was that angry. How’s he explaining this one? There was a big blizzard at the time…hard to carry conversation…he just funneled it into motivation. We wish we could’ve sat in on that first conversation between the famously stubborn coach and player … On the next page: Dirk‘s championship bender rolls on, OKC makes moves, Dwight and Gilbert Arenas battle on another level.

Ron Artest‘s agent says World Peace won’t be playing in Europe any time soon. Stuff like this never seems to materialize. We’ll hear all summer about guys possibly going to Europe to play, but because of voided contracts, injuries and fishy money situations, we doubt any of it happens … The partying for Dirk just doesn’t stop. He returned home to a personal parade of about 15,000 people in his hometown in Germany, signing a golden book. Apparently, the crowd hit Dirk with their own rendition of “We Are the Champions” (hopefully it was better than his version). The big man admitted in an interview just a few days earlier that he’s on a three week partying binge, which amazingly is even less than what they did in 2006 to get over the Finals loss. Nowadays, as a 33-year-old, he can’t hit it hard on back-to-back nights. Bummer. Catching up with JET yesterday (and Rudy Gay) for another Call of Duty brouhaha, Terry said he couldn’t top this. We aren’t sure if ANYONE can. You know who Dirk reminds us of? Stu from the Hangover. You go out with him and something crazy is bound to happen. You might wake up with a tattoo or a dead body or a pet howler monkey. You never know … Is J.J. Redick good enough to be a starter? Those are the rumblings coming out of Orlando as it’s becoming apparent they won’t be able to afford Jason Richardson. Also, is this a good thing for an organization trying not to displease Dwight Howard? Or is he too busy planking to even notice? … OKC picked up the options on half their freakin’ team – Serge Ibaka, James Harden, Eric Maynor, Byron Mullens and Cole Aldrich. Amazing, this team made the WCF and yet they have so many still on their rookie deals … Just when you thought it was safe to head back to Gilbert ArenasTwitter, he goes and does this … And former All-Star Antoine Walker was put on probation and ordered to pay $750k after he pleaded guilty to passing bad checks in the form of unpaid gambling debts in Las Vegas … We’re out like planking.

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