Draymond Green avoided a suspension for perhaps intentionally kicking the balls of Steven Adams during Game 3 of the Western Conference Finals on Monday night. Unless he has an undiagnosed jimmy legs condition like Sarah Silverman had on that episode of Seinfeld, Green might’ve got away with one.
But did you know that kicks to the balls in the Western Finals and Oklahoma City are something of a tradition?
Picture it. San Antonio. Oklahoma City. 2014. Russell Westbrook drives to the hoop and, for some unknown reason, goes full Jean-Claude Van Damme and kicks Tim Duncan right in the ol’ beanbag.
As Andre the Giant would say, that’s very unsportsmanlike. When it comes to nutshots, basketball seems to be underrated. It’s not like hockey where a dude is jamming a stick into an area that is only meant to be treated tenderly and with love. Draymond basically went full Karate Kid on Adams and Westbrook had some sort of Neo/Trinity/Morpheus floating side kick Matrix action happening. It’s art, really.
So when Westbrook complains about his teammate’s testicles having a giant foot jammed into them, well, that sort of hypocrisy takes balls.
Sorry. That was some low-hanging fruit I just hit. Plums, perhaps.