Shaquille O’Neal’s 10 Best Quotes

Shaquille O’Neal is no stranger to being considered one of the game’s most powerful inside player ever.

Once you get past the 7-1, 320-pound frame that screams power, however, it became pretty easy to see early in his career he was light on his feet — on and off the court. Today is the big man’s 41st birthday. Here are some of his best quotes — proving he’s as deft with a microphone as he is on the low block.

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*Be careful what you ask, because SHAQ will loop you into the answer if it’s a bad enough question.

*You thought SHAQ was going to retire — until he led off his press conference with a dig at the Knicks’ haywire GM job. At 1:35, he calls himself the Phil Jackson of little league basketball.

*Speaking of Phil Jackson, SHAQ‘s take on the legendary Triangle Offense: “Our offense is like the Pythagorean Theorem. There is no answer.”

*Here among another list of SHAQ‘s top quotes is this gem on his alma mater, LSU, at 1:22: “LSU stands for Love Shaq University … can you dig it?”

*SHAQ on the good things in life: “Me having a beautiful wife and great family and friends around me, all the money I’ve got, all the things that I’ve got, a Ferrari that I just ripped the top off of and turned into a convertible, the rings I got, the two mansions on the water, a master’s in criminal justice, I’m a cop, plus I look good. So me shooting 40 percent at the foul line is just God’s way of saying that nobody’s perfect. If I shot 90 percent from the line, it just wouldn’t be right.”

*SHAQ on coining another nickname: “The Big IPO. Put your money on me. Because when I go public, we all gonna make money.”

*It’s not a quote so much as it is a performance, but SHAQ as a Laker takes on Vlade Divac‘s proclamation the Kings would win.

*Check out this exchange between Cedric The Entertainer and SHAQ.

Cedric The Entertainer: If you were an AND 1 player, what nickname would you have?
Shaquille O’Neal: Lemme see… what would it be? Probably, uh…Diesel. Either Diesel or… you know, I don’t know.
CTE: Come on, man. You’re famous for your nicknames. I thought you’d come up with something better than that.
SO: All right. How ’bout O’nealiony Montana?
CTE: O’Nealiony Montana?
SO: Yeah, because I’m the biggest thing to hit Miami since Tony Montana.

*During his introductory press conference in Miami, SHAQ‘s take on joining the Heat: “This is another classic Shaquille O’Neal quote. I’m like toilet paper, tooth paste and certain other amenities. I’m proven to be good.”

*And after telling Laker fans “it takes two to make a thing go right” at the Lakers’ title rally, SHAQ starts rapping (followed by the classic Mark Madsen dance). Can you dig it?

What’s your favorite Shaq quote?

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