With Dwyane Wade saying in his Dime cover story (and again recently) that the marquee free agents would get together and talk about free agency, we decided to make a mock conversation between him, LeBron, Chris Bosh and Joe Johnson. Here it goes:
DW: Alright guys, we can all sign anywhere we want this summer, where are you think about going?
LBJ: Ohio is home, I love New York and Jay-Z is my boy, so we will see. I have to talk everything over with my team first and we need to decide.
CB: I asked my Twitter fans and that didn’t help, so I don’t know who to go to now.
JJ: I’m getting max money from someone so that’s where I’m headed.
DW: I see. Oh Chris, I have an idea, why don’t you make a YouTube video touting your free agency, and campaigning for yourself like you did for the All-Star game a few years ago?
CB: Great idea Dwyane, I think that is my next move. I don’t know if I can make such a big decision without going through some type of electronic media.
DW: LeBron so what are your thoughts, you haven’t really given us any indication of where you want to go?
LBJ: I need to talk to my team, my guys. Worldwide Wes, Leon, all those guys. I don’t know where I’m headed.
DW: Well, I love Miami. I’m a loyal guy and they’ve been loyal to me – something Chicago has some issues with. I’ll sign anywhere I feel I can win though, and if Miami shows they are committed to winning, I’m going to probably stay. Who wants in?
JJ: I don’t care, I’m a max player. I don’t even care if the fans show up. I’m not re-signing in Atlanta though. After they booed me, I’m done with them.
DW: What if you don’t get max money but can play for a winner?
JJ: I’m a max player. Period.
LBJ: Joe, you only get max dollars if a team can’t sign me or Dwyane. Stop talking.
CB: LeBron, I really want to play with you, I’ll probably sign with whoever you sign with.
LBJ: What if I sign with the Nets? You said you wouldn’t play there.
CB: I’d have to ask my Twitter followers first, but next is the YouTube video.
DW: So let’s sum this up. I’m probably staying in Miami; LeBron you need to talk to your team and you love everywhere; Joe you are a max player; and Chris, you need to work on a YouTube video. So that’s where this conversation has gone. I should never have suggested this. Damn it.