The Minnesota Timberwolves’ mascot, Crunch the Wolf, was apparently handing out some Christmas presents for young fans plucked from the stands at the Timberwolves’ game against the Sacramento Kings on Friday night when he decided to go full grinch and give, then take away, a PS4 from a young Kings fan. It’s, to quote our old friend Pete Blackburn, a savage and perplexing move to pull on a child.
Certain mascots, not content to simply amble around arenas giving hugs and chucking t-shirts, have to walk the fine line between charming and obnoxious — call it the Philly Phanatic Paradigm (Pharadigm?). It can produce good comedy, like with their blood feud against Robin Lopez, but instances like this are just mean. Well, if it was real — as it turns out, it was just a bit of kayfabe:
Listen Crunch, you’re not an institution like the Phanatic, so you don’t get the leeway that he does (and lots of people hate him anyway). Your concept would be more appropriate if Timberwolves was the name of a cereal, rather than a basketball team. Better be nice, or watch out the next time Robin Lopez comes to town — we have no compunction tattling on you for this.