A Pooping, Vomiting Drunk Lady Evacuated A Sold-Out Screening Of ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’ In England

Senior Editor
02.26.15 37 Comments
Fifty-Shades-Of-Shomiting

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A pooping, vomiting drunk lady caused the evacuation of a sold-out, Valentine’s Day screening of Fifty Shades Of Grey in Milton Keynes, England recently. To clarify, this was a different screening than the Scottish showing of Fifty Shades where women vomited in the aisles and a man got “glassed.” This movie’s so sexy, some people just lose control.

The entire audience had to be evacuated after one woman, believed to be drunk, vomited copiously during the film.

Another source added: “I’m not sure of her age but she so drunk she couldn’t move. She practically had to be 
carried out. And the mess she left behind was just 
disgusting.

“There was no way they could clean it up there and then – it would be a specialist job, so the film was stopped and everybody had to leave.”

Fifty Shades of Shomiting. I would love to see this event recreated with a marble figurine on a fountain.

“She lost control of 
everything, including all bodily 
fluids. The whole cinema stank,” said one disgruntled cinema-goer.

“We all expected to see Christian Grey gag 
Anastasia as part of the plot.

“We certainly didn’t 
expect to be gagging ourselves because of the stench.”

Hiyoooo. A drunk lady shomits down the aisle of a sex movie, and the ghost of Bob Hope just happens to be around to provide commentary, what a wonderful story. “There was a mass evacuation, and then the theater cleared out.” (*chomps cigar*) (*swings imaginary golf club*)

“It was an absolute 
disaster. There is nothing less romantic than seeing a 
woman be violently ill 
everywhere,” said one couple.

Speak for yourself. My desires are somewhat… unconventional.

This week Cineworld seemed reluctant to talk about the incident. Calls to their press office were unanswered and messages were ignored. [MiltonKeynesCitizen]

Well sure, they were probably just on the other line with a shomit-removal specialist. Nigel’s Shomit Steaming And Broken Glass Removal Emporium, with branches all over the UK. Our prices are so low you’ll piss, sh*t, puke, and stab yourself.

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