FilmDrunk

An Interview With A Man In A Floor-Length Fur Coat Standing Outside A Porn Convention

As you might imagine, you meet some interesting characters at the AVN Awards and AEE Expo, the Comic-Con-style exhibition dedicated to all things porn. I was there last weekend, my second year in a row. It’s been something of an enduring fascination for me to see who some of these people are who pay to hang out in an airplane hangar full of porn stars. I’ve always wanted to find out more about them, what brings them here, what’s going on in their lives. At the same time, I’m a little shy, and frankly, most of them scare me. But I saw Flashman here standing outside the Pink Taco (of course) and he seemed like an open book.

FILMDRUNK: [Looking at name badge] So you’re Flashman? [Brilliant deduction, me]

FLASHMAN: Yes.

Is that a persona? How long have you been Flashman?

It’s my 20th year here and I booked 186 girls, and I made a lot of money, and the world is terrific. Flashman porn, I made 7.7 million and never got in trouble with IRS. If you go to Flashman Porn the first three pictures are me.

And then when you say “booked”–

I booked them for movies and we do Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, all the parties. The world is terrific when you’re making money.com.

So, you book them for parties, or how does that work?

Yes. They pay me and porn stars all we can drink, all we want to eat, and they give us about $500 to $2,000 to show up at the parties, dress wild, the girls show their tits and we all get drunk and we walk up to people like Robert Leach and Howard Stern and Ringo Starr and we go, “What’s happening!?”

So how did you get into the business of dressing wild and going to parties?

I have no I idea. In 1995, I moved to Beverly Hills, I retired. I’m getting close to 70, and I hung out at the Rainbow Bar on Sunset Strip with Elton John and Bowie. I slept with Angela Bowie, he married Iman though so I was cool, and that was in the early 70s when I moved to Beverly Hills, Hollywood.

How does this year compare to past years as someone who’s been here for the last 20?

It was much better in the 90s and around the early 2000s, but it’s gotten a lot better this year than it was when it sagged a little bit. The economy’s come back.

Why has it gotten better, just because of the economy?

The economy, and the girls look younger to me.

What was the best year and why?

1995, my first year when I was… 18 years old, I am 38 now [winking at me], and it was at the Sahara Hotel and Jenna Jameson, Ron Jeremy looked young, and it was fantastic.

Doesn’t he still look young?

He is here tonight and he is doing it. We call him the Hedghog. He is a Jewish boy like me, surreal life from New Jersey. He was with Tammy Barker and Vanilla Ice Ice Baby. [Editor’s Note: Amazingly, I don’t believe he was making this part up.]

Who is your favorite pornstar of all time?

It might be Jenna Jameson. She went to Clark High School. I met her when she had ‘A’ cup, no tits, she was dancing at the Crazy Horse in Vegas. Then she got her boobs done, blond hair, she made $25 million in 2005, Club Jenna.

Awesome, thank you.

You are a great man, thank you.

Vince Mancini is a writer and comedian living in San Francisco. You can find more of his work on FilmDrunk, the Uproxx network, the Portland Mercury, the East Bay Express, and all over his mom’s refrigerator. Fan FilmDrunk on Facebook, find the latest movie reviews here.

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