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(This is my new segment, where I recommend movies you can stream on Netflix Instant. No, these are not advertorials.)
I know, I know, I should’ve seen King of Kong a long time ago. I don’t know why I didn’t. It just slipped through the cracks like your sister’s queef. But that’s not important now. The point is, I finally saw it, and god d*mn is it good. So, so good.
I may have been subconsciously avoiding King of Kong because it’s a documentary about two guys competing for the Donkey Kong world record, and I’m sort of averse to anything related to video games. But as I found out, the fact that it’s a documentary about video gamers isn’t really important. Almost nothing about the plot is important except that it involves Billy Mitchell. Billy Mitchell might be the best movie character of all time. Billy Mitchell is like Fred Simmons from The Foot Fist Way and the Rex Kwon Do guy from Napoleon Dynamite combined, and yet by most accounts, he is a real person. He has flowing, blow-dried mane. He wears patriotic neckties, in which he takes great pride. He is a hot-sauce magnate. He holds the Donkey Kong world record. Of course he is from Florida. He is a far more complex and awesome villain than you could ever write. He’s like a local used-car salesman who has convinced everyone around him that he actually is the character he plays in his wacky commercials. He even has henchman! In the world of competitive arcade gaming, he is a God among dorks.
Billy Mitchell is the most awesome thing about King of Kong, but he’s not the only awesome thing. Everyone in it (mostly people who care a lot about world records in 80s arcade games) has that amazing combination of incredible dorkiness mixed with recognizable humanity. They are some of the most incredible dorks in all of dorkdom, and you will surely recognize yourself in them. Like Napoleon Dynamite, you would swear they blocked off all the streets in order to shoot a period piece set in 1990, yet King of Kong was reportedly shot on location in reality in 2005-2007, in ostensibly real places like Hollywood, Florida and Lake Winnipesaukee, New Hampshire. I started watching King of Kong at about 11:30 at night expecting to fall asleep halfway through. Not only did I watch the entire thing, I spent the next hour on the computer looking for the latest updates on the characters.
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Yeah, this movie is brilliant. Billy Mitchell is a stunning creation; a preening, spineless, self-absorbed douchebag of the highest order. Even creepier is his glassy-eyed cabal of acolytes who he sets forth like winged monkeys to sabotage Steve Weibe at every opportunity.
A God among dorks? Around here, we call that Fek.
Agreed. I put it off and then when I finally watched it the effect was like a million women in a million kitchens making me a million sammiches. Same for Man On Wire, which you need to see now if you haven’t.
I mean I’m the homeowner It’s my house. I’m the wife of the donkey kong guy. They should have respected my wishes and left my mom alone and not come in. But they didn’t.
As a former Pacific Northwesterner, I was rooting for Steve Weibe at every turn. My favorite part of the flick is when they interview his buddies at a backyard BBQ. So awesome.
So is it reasonable to assume, It’s On Like Donkey Kong™?
The King of Kong would never even dream of censoring the word “damn”.
Yet do you think The Mighty Feklahr can get Lince to stream “Class of Nukem High”???
Is he trying to cosplay Gaius Baltar?
Dude, you’re getting the harem all wrong.
You know how to tell that this isn’t fiction? When the director of this, Seth Gordon, does fiction you end up with Four Christmases.
Gorillas be raping eryone out here, snatching our women up, hide your kids and hide your wives! Mama-mia he’s a throwing flaming barrels too, a holy shit!
Top 3 boobs on King of Kong:
3. Mrs. Mitchell’s lefty
2. Mrs. Mitchell’s righty
1. Billy Mitchell
This movie, albeit awesome, didn’t scratch the surface of the dorkdom. Check out Chasing Ghosts: Beyond the Arcade. It’s a few of the ones profiled in KoK along with a few additions and really gets cringe-worthy creepy-awesome in a couple places.
I liked it too and I know its not all that creative or funny but I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t post what a narcissistic, cowardly, piece of shit I think Billy Mitchell is. I don’t think I could talk to him for more than a few minutes without punching him in the pussy. The film makers deserve a medal for being able to film all that bullshit from him without wearing helmets or wrist braces to protect them from injury what with all the dismissive wanking they MUST have been doing.
O’Weibe RULES!