Senior Editor
09.18.08 211 Comments

It’s been known for some time that Lionsgate is planning to make a $100 million budgeted Conan the Barbarian movie. But who would direct the homoerotic epic about a sweaty, steel-phallus wielding beefcake? Why, none other than trannie-loving movie ruiner Brett Ratner, if rumors are to be believed.

We got word today that Nu Image is offering the long-awaited new Conan movie to, of all people, Brett Ratner. Over the years there have been so directors circling this project, everyone from Robert Rodriguez to Rob Zombie, the fact that Brett Ratner might actually attach himself to this and make it a reality is almost enough to make one wish they’d just stop trying to bring Robert E. Howard’s creation back to the big screen.

We’ll wait until we get some more solid details on this before giving up completely, but if Ratner does get it, I think it’ll be pretty clear that Nu Image doesn’t give a single hell what the fans want to see from a new Conan movie. [DreadCentral]

I’m excited about this. Brett Ratner can do anything. I hope he makes this just like his Miley Cyrus video, with Conan looking directly at the camera and singing about how Nick Jonas broke his heart. God, I hope they work this into Entourage episode somehow.

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