Senior Editor
09.09.09 25 Comments

Have you noticed that pitches for real, serious movies have become indistinguishable from comedic, fictional movie pitches?  It’s true.  Seriously, if I put a gun to your head and demanded you tell me whether this is an article from Variety or something I made up, could you?

Mandate Pictures has picked up the teen dance drama script “Dream On” from Jason Ubaldi for Laurence Mark to produce.  Ubaldi is penning “Treasure Hunters” with Broken Road Prods., and “The Lowenfish Party” for Cheyenne Enterprises. Mark, who most recently produced “Julie and Julia,” and “Dreamgirls” before that, will produce “Dream On” with Rachel Miller, who conceived the idea.

Project revolves around an aspiring Olympic gymnast who discovers the underground hip-hop scene in Atlanta.

That’s right, they’re making Da Hip Hop Gymnast.  That was someone’s idea, and the studio thought it was so good, they not only greenlit, but made them a producer.  I can see it now… A promising young gymnast is forced to drop out of the olympics when her kid sister gets sick.  An experimental operation can save her life, but the operation costs $10,000.  Which just so happens to be the prize money of the Underground Hip Hop Dance Contest.  She signs up, but she’s bad at first.  The laughingstock of the underground hip hop community.  “Yo, that leotard is WHACK!” they tease.  But with an open mind and a little help from a montage, the underground hip hop rec center soon realizes that it’s they who could be learning something from her.  She wows them at the grand finale.  “Damn, girl, what was that move?  That move was NASTY!” they cheer.    “Nah,” she says. “It was GYMnasty.”

*rides into sunset on pommel horse*

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