Senior Editor
10.09.09 19 Comments

If you’ve ever seen Elephant or Last Days, you know that despite also making some good movies, Gus Van Sant has been known to partake in the smell of his own farts.  His latest project is called Restless, and according to THR, Mia Wasikowska (Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland) is set to play the lead.   And according to MovieLine, who’ve read the script, it sounds, like, really deep. (*brushes bangs out of face*)

Protagonist Enoch Brae is a 17-year-old funeral crasher, drawn to attending strangers’ memorials after losing both his parents. At one of them, he meets the beautiful, tomboyish Annabel Cotton, a 16-year-old with Six Months to Live. Love then blooms among the gravestones as “the moon looks on knowingly and sympathetically.”

The only thing I can think of when I read “as the moon looks on knowingly and sympathetically” is standing next to the young lovers with my pants down doing the ass-talk thing.  “Don’t worry, Annabel, I ffffeel your pppppppppaaain.”  Here’s an ever-so-brief script excerpt:

This is ENOCH BRAE (17).  He is wiry, with the pained good looks of romantics from long past eras.  He has a visible toughness that is betrayed by a natural fragility.

His toughness is also betrayed by the atomic wedgie he just received for wearing girl’s jeans and being named “Enoch.”

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