Florida Friday: Man Sets Fire To Neighbor's House, Calls 911, Drinks A Cold Brew

One of the fun things about living in Florida is watching people react to all of the crazy news that is reported out of this state. I love when people are like, “Oh my God, don’t they ever learn?” because obviously we don’t learn. Take, for instance, James Bates, who was jailed yesterday for admitting to setting six fires.

Okay, so the guy likes to start fires and now he’s in jail. That’s nothing new. Well, except that he’s been doing it since the 1970s and he does it with a style all his own. You could almost say he’s a man of flare.

*high fives homeless meth addict*

Investigators said they aren’t sure how many homes Bates might have set on fire. The most recent house he is accused of setting fire to is on Saxon Drive in New Smyrna Beach. It is next door to his home.

“It’s right next door. The, the, the fire is going right through the roof,” Bates said in the call to 911.

Bates sounded surprised as he described the blaze to a dispatcher.

“These flames are going silly now, they’re going crazy, like the whole, the whole roof is engulfed,” said Bates to the 911 operator.

“Keep everyone away from the fire and we’ll be out there shortly, OK?” said the operator.

“Alright, please come because this thing is really getting goofy,” said Bates.

“Alright, they’re on their way out there, thank you sir,” the operator said.

Investigators said when firefighters arrived they found Bates sitting in a chair in his front yard, watching it all unfold while sipping a beer. (Via WFTV)

You might think this guy’s a dick because he goes around lighting houses on fire, but he’s really a dick because he didn’t even offer the cops or firemen beers. Party foul, bro.