Senior Editor
09.18.07 31 Comments

Zoë Saldaña has signed on to play Uhura in the new J.J. Abrams-produced Star Trek movie. You may remember her from such films as Crossroads, Drumline, Center Stage, and probably some other crap I haven't seen.  Oh, she was also in the Terminal. Man did that movie suck. 

[Uhura] was a member of the bridge crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise who rose to the rank of commander. Nichelle Nichols played the Starfleet Academy alum in the series.

Abrams is producing "Star Trek," which revolves around the crew's early days at Starfleet Academy, through his Paramount-based Bad Robot shingle.

Despite the fact that "Uhura" comes from the Swahili word for freedom, uhuru, Saldaña is actually Dominican.  ¡Ay caramba! I've never made love to a Dominican, but I imagine it's spicy.

In other news, I can't find a single naked picture of her on the internet.  It's times like these I realize my life has no meaning.  Also, whenever I sidle up to next to someone at a urinal I like to say "Number One, engage."

[via Variety]

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