Hugh Grant’s ‘The Rewrite’ Trailer Is Here To Charm You Or Whatever

08.29.14 3 years ago 4 Comments

For a period of time from 1989–1999, I was subjected to a series of terrifying sleepovers, where I was forced to endure Hugh Grant rom-com after rom-com, always without my consent. And while it’s been five years since Grant’s last romantic adventure (Did You Hear About The Morgans?), he’s back in full PTSD force in the latest trailer for The Rewrite. At least the mushroom cut is gone.

Rewrite tells the story of Keith Michaels, an out-of-work screenwriter forced to take on a job teaching film at a local university to make some extra crash. I think we’re supposed to theoretically empathize with Michael’s plight, but let me tell you this: as someone with a little bit of experience in the teaching professions, college kids are Sour Patch kids. You haven’t seen anything until you watch a high school student pull a supersized dildo out of her backpack and then scream at her principal to shake hands with it (Additional tangent: that principal later took a leave of absence after being pummeled by baby carrots in the school cafeteria).

Michaels has absolutely no teaching skills – so charming right? – and is far more interested in chasing after the younger girls in the class than doing any real work. At one point, Grant reveals to a room full of teachers that he’s a little bit tired of “Jane Austen” and “female empowerment.” My guess – and I could be wrong – is that we’re supposed to laugh at this joke, even though (1)not funny and (2) the ladies of Bath weren’t exactly bra-burners (although who can forget the “Corset Campaign” of 1813?!?). Despite Michael’s lack of integrity, he still manages to find love in Holly (Marisa Tomei), a single mom and student working two jobs to support her current children and future adult child, Hugh Grant.

Rewrite is set to be released in U.K. theaters on October 8. To my delight, there’s no US release date yet.

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Charm = No buttons, foreign accent, Naired chest

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