Van Damme made a super homoerotic video tribute to his bro Georges St. Pierre

What’s this? Oh, just Jean-Claude Van Damme helping Georges St. Pierre stretch out his groin muscles. What? Don’t look at me like that, that’s just what bros do, we help each other. What else do bros do? Well, according to Jean-Claude Van Damme, bros make epic video tributes to their bros, like the one you see below, editing together clips from their movies with clips from their bros’ MMA training. At least, that’s what JCVD did for his bro GSP. The groin stretching clips are set to epic opera choir music and overlaid with motivational quotes, by the way, as you do. Van Damme apparently produced this video and released it on the internet… just because.  In the dedication at the end of the video, Van Damme says:

“Hi Georges. The memories of our friendship, of a great country and a great city, Montreal, and a great team of people surrounding us, made of love, sports, health, and like I said … friendship.”

And then he punctuates the sentence fragment with a high kick, and shot freeze frames, goes to black and white, and fades out like an eighties TV show. This… this is real. Stunning.

I always assumed that Steven Seagal was the crazier of these two, what with Above the Law being semi-autobiographical, Seagal claiming to know the secrets behind Iran-Contra and the death of Brandon Lee, etc., etc., but Van Damme is definitely narrowing the gap with this one. How is it action movie stars have such insane chutzpah? He makes a video where he’s giving fighting pointers to the current and multiple-time UFC welterweight world champion? Because he fights people in movies? He’s in great shape and all, and he supposedly had a successful run in karate tournaments when he was younger, but so what? I was captain of the golf team in high school, if I hung out with Tiger Woods for a weekend, I wouldn’t be like, “Come here, bro, let me show you the best way to line up a putt.”

That said, I’d pay ten times the amount of a regular pay-per-view to see a tag-team MMA match between Anderson Silva-Steven Seagal and GSP-Van Damme.

[thanks to Fightlinker for that gif and the transcription]

JCVD + GSP, sittin’ in a tree, S-T-R-E-T-C-H-I-N-G…

 

 

×