Sony recently submitted a bid for the rights to the Termnator franchise on the final day of bidding. No word on what their bid was, but one assumes it was higher than Lionsgate’s floor bid of $15 million. And further that if they’re spending that much on it, that they’ll want to make another Terminator movie. I did a search for Sony in my old posts to see what kind of Terminator we might expect from them if they got it, and the projects that came up, in order of newest to oldest, were:
– The latest Da Vinci Code movie
– The Spider-Man reboot (because they wouldn’t let Sam Raimi have the villain he wanted)
– The Karate Kid remake starring Will Smith’s son and set in China (where they don’t even have Karate)
– A movie based on the board game Risk
– Men in Black 3.
Doing worse than hiring the guy from Charlie’s Angels won’t be easy, but that list is looking downright Fox-like. Let’s see, we’ve done bad Terminator, good Terminator, molten-metal Terminator, hot-chick Terminator, Terminator with a human heart, Christian Bale-screaming-for-no-reason-at-a-Terminator Terminator… perhaps we’re due for… sassy fat black Terminator in drag? Dorky Chinese Terminator? Obviously, I’ve got my fingers crossed for racial stereotypes. Why for-a you no tell-a Papa where-a Sara Connor? You mamma slappa you face.