TRAILER: Star Trek Into Darkness has tits, fire, and Robocop

Senior Editor
03.21.13 67 Comments
Hi, I’m the ship’s doctor, this is how we look and dress in the future

The second trailer for Star Trek Into Darkness just hit the web, and as I’ve said all along, letting JJ Abrams direct both Star Trek and Star Wars was a weird idea, like the same guy running both Coke and Pepsi, or having Mick Jagger sing for the Beatles. In this new trailer, it looks like Abrams just gets confused as to which one he’s making and films an homage to that Star Wars scene where the Millennium Falcon has to turn sideways to fit between the asteroids:

And then there’s an explosion montage and Alice Eve shows up in her underwear for some reason (not that I’m complaining), and it’s all pew pew guns tits ‘murica! USA! USA! USA! I enjoy it, but you’d think they could’ve included something for tha ladies. Like maybe Kirk sets his phasers to “disrobe” and he shoots Benedict Cumberbatch, and Cumberbatch is just standing there all sweaty and sexy and covered dirt and grime wearing nothing but his big cloth man panties or whatever British people wear down there. Are you guys writing this down?

Also, I don’t know why they bother sending out a spaceship to catch the bad guy when Robocop clearly works at Starfleet.

Listen to your friend Robocop, Captain Kirk. He’s a cool dude.

Opens May 17th.

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