FlipBoard
In a recent interview with Hitfix, Taylor Lautner called the werewolf-on-infant love affair in Twilight Breaking Dawn a “touchy subject,” and if I could rig this headline to make a slide-whistle sound when you clicked it, I totally would. You may recall that the plot of Breaking Dawn involves Jacob the Shirtless Werewolf (wolves have higher body temperatures, you see) falling in love with Bella and Edward’s telepathic, half-vampire fetus, Renesmee, a process called “imprinting.” A dirty ethnic wolf that wants nothing more than to bang your sparkling white baby before it’s even born might be considered problematic by some, but who better to ask for clarification than Taylor Lautner, a guy with all the charisma of an old shoe? Tell us, how did you deal with this idiotic premise, shoe?
“I was nervous about that one, because imprinting is a very complicated and touchy thing. Ummm, so. It helped, because we had Stephenie Meyer, who created this whole imprinting thing on set with us the whole time. Trust me, I picked her brain quiiite a bit about it, and that made me feel a lot more comfortable.”
If Taylor Lautner is ever comfortable I’d hate to see what uncomfortable looks like. This guy acts like a robot that’s been raised by gay publicists.
“Stephenie told me, stop trying to complicate it, to just keep it simple, to think of it as a lifelong bond between two human beings, and to not think about where it’s going and what’s going to happen, because right now, at this stage, he’s really more of a protector, he protects Renesmee.”
I’ve never seen a Twilight movie in theaters before, but I’m thinking of busting my cherry on this one. It looks potentially like the funniest movie of the year. I mean just look at this:
RUN, BELLA! YOU’VE ANGERED THE COUNCIL OF MALL GOTHS!
Pretty much every frame I’ve seen so far has been unintentional humor of the highest level. I imagine the rest of the film is just the characters exchanging “who farted” looks.
Did you see how long these stupid looks last in the video?? There’s no way the director isn’t in on the joke at this point. See also:
Yep, this is going to be good.
![[avatar]](https://profilecdn-woven.netdna-ssl.com/photo/257/profile)
Part 1 is funny on the same level and in the same way as The Room so I have high hopes for this one.
You’ve actually hit the nail on the head here. The entire first movie feels like the director and 2 main stars are mailing it the fuck in.
Case in point, Llamautner takes his shirt off 30 seconds into the movie, for literally no logical reason whatsoever, and then never again. Bill Condon, the director, knocked it out quick and moved on to “better” things.
Having Stephenie Meyer on set the whole time sounds like it would be an asset for any movie. I’m sure she was able to explain what War Horse was thinking when it had to plow the field. She explained it to the horse, which was good practice for Al Paca up there.
Nice name spelling by the way, Stephenie.
It’s pronounced “Stee-Phee-Knee” (rhymes with “Renesmee”).
I need to know everything about Bella’s takedown up there. Was she required to wear a cocktail dress for hunting or did she come straight from the club? How about shoes? Is she allowed to go helmet-to-helmet? Answers!
Brendan–how’s her form?
I’d seen that GIF a billion times before now, but I just noticed the lion puttin’ its paw down to brace itself. It’s the little things.
Posting an arm/leg/limb like that is a good way to get it broken during a takedown.
She keeps her head behind the back leg as opposed to in front of it, which is a solid rugby tackle, since without a helmet you’re vulnerable to taking a knee to the face and getting a concussion. Though having your head outside the leg like that does leave you vulnerable to the guillotine if you don’t move quickly.
That first picture screams “THUG LIFE!”
I would be lying if I said getting drunk at this movie and exploding in laughter at every scene of utterly ridiculous stupidity didn’t sound like a good idea.
That does sound like a good idea.
I haven’t seen a movie in theaters since Amazing Spider-Man and doing that just might get me back out there.
He “picked Stephenies brain”? That is funniest thing I have read all day.
All of these have made excellent drinking games. I can’t remember which is was, but my wife and I went through an 18 pack in the two hour runtime. We were shitfaced, to say the least.
Baby llama drama.
+1
I like how the progressive, good vampires get their clothes from Aeropostale; but the bad ones actually dress sort of like vampires. It’s like watching moderate Republicans vs. angry steampunk goths. And according to the picture I guess Africans and Pocahontases are bad too. Or maybe “TEH ETHNICS” are good. Now I’m confused.
Teenage suicide: a growing problem.
My god that GIF gets me every time, Im laughing like a moron in here.
Stop trying to complicate things Taylor! Its just a simple, classic tale of a part-man part-wolf who obsessively wants to ravage a half-vampire infant that is the daughter of the formerly human, now vampire girl that he previously desperately wanted to nail.
JESUS LAUTNER ITS SIMPLE!!!!!