Terrence Howard has a new movie coming out, and you know what that means: it means that we get to see him in a new hat. Not only that, but we also get to hear him spout off in interviews, which is always fun because he’s a special kind of nutty. While talking to MovieFanatic during the press tour for Dead Man Down, which looks so generic that tickets should be half price, the talk naturally turned to The Butler coming out later this year, from batsh*t director Lee Daniels, in which Terrence Howard apparently shares some love scenes with none other than Oprah Winfrey. Terrence Howard is normally such a chilled out, philosophical beatnik that he exists on an entirely separate plane of reality, but something about Oprahs bewbs makes him sound downright coherent.
Here’s what he told MovieFanatic:
“Oprah and I had such chemistry. To be able to make out with Oprah and to have love scenes with her and those tig ol’ bitties,” Howard said and laughed. “She’s such a voluptuous woman. That was wonderful.”
Actually, as you’ll see in the video of the interview below, he calls her “volumptuous,” which I enjoy almost as much as the use of the phrase “tig ol’ bitties.” You know, when I first heard “tig ol’ bitties,” I must’ve been in middle school, and I never thought it would catch on. It just seemed like such a weird, low-fi way to euphemize something. And we don’t apply it to anything else. Like, you never hear guys going “Oh, Sally? Yeah, man, I’ve been seeing Sally. I tell you what, I just can’t get enough of that pig hairy bussy of hers. You know, if you catch my drift. I’m telling you, bros, I get lost in that thing.”
Did she cry out “Oh, Gale!”?
I notice he didn’t mention her vight ‘lil tagina.
Is throwing up in my mouth a little bit something I’m supposed to enjoy? Fer’ crissakes, man.
*spraypaints “CREE FANDY” on van, puts cardboard in windows*
he says ‘velumptuous’ bee tee dubs
I was always partial to gazongas.
And without a wig and makeup she looks like Clint Howard. Terrence needs to lay off the spice.
I can’t believe that Your Favorite Martian is what came to my mind first. [youtu.be]
“Volumptuous” sounds like something out of “The Jabberwocky.”
If that is a “vorpal sword” reference, The Mighty Feklahr might have to start snooping through your garbage more often.
Apparently, getting super chached before press junket isn’t a good idea.
Also not a good idea? Being T-Howard.
What? No Terrence monologue?! This future sucks.
I debated. But he didn’t dovetail so nicely with the character in this one. Don’t worry, he’s got multiple press tours to get through this year, there will be other opportunities.
He was on Kimmel last week, talking about how he makes diamonds or some shit. He is very weird, but incredibly charming and interesting.
Every time you make out with Oprah, a donation is made to a charity in Africa.
I imagine her nipples extending out three inches like those bic mechanical pencil erasers when you check to see how much is left.