Twilight shoes even gayer than expected

Senior Editor
07.06.10 75 Comments

Afraid you’re too unfashionable to be accepted into the local foppish goth coven?  Well I’ve got just the thing: Edward Cullen’s shoes!  Brand new from the Pyramid Collection (Myth, Magick, Fantasy & Romance) come these handsome dress shoes, perfect for a Ren Faire mixer or Wiccan prom.

Vampires of distinction love these: glossy, patent-leather-and-velour gentleman’s shoes, fashioned in blood red and midnight black [as opposed to sunrise black…], with large, faceted-crystal medallions on the instep. [source]

Looking through the rest of the Pyramid Collection website, I find that they have separate sections for plus-sized clothing (of course), as well as “coats and capes,” which is great because I’d been searching for a good plus-sized cape.  Really, all patent-leather-and-velour shoes should come with a good plus-sized cape included, for your date to wear.  They could have matching faceted-crystal medallions like a corsage.  That would be hot.  Anyway, I’d love to show these to the God-hates-f*gs Twihard, just to see if it would shake her faith.  “Oh no, Jesus says velour is an abomination!”

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