Will Anna Faris bang Captain America?

04.26.11 7 years ago 18 Comments

In What’s Your Number, opening September 30th, from director Mark Mylod (Ali G Indahouse), based on Karyn Bosnak*’s novel, protagonist Anna Faris hears that “in America, 96% of women who’ve been with 20 or more lovers can’t find a husband.”

Naturally, she dedicates her life to this statistic, trying to find Mr. Right from the pool of dudes who’ve already been up in her (who are all wacky comedy actors!) to keep her number under 20.  Then one day, a super-handsome, down-to-Earth, fellow Caucasian played by Chris Evans bumbles into her apartment.  They make a deal that he’ll help her track down her exes, and she’ll help him escape his.  How Chris Evans would be able to help a stranger find her ex boyfriends, I have no idea.  Maybe he’s a super-hot private investigator?  But fine, I’ll go with it.  WILL ANNA BE ABLE TO FIND MR. RIGHT WHEN HE’S BEEN RIGHT THERE ALL ALONG?  WILL SHE BREAK HER OWN SILLY RULE SHE MADE AT THE END OF ACT 1 IN ORDER TO GET WITH HER OBVIOUS LOVE INTEREST AT THE END OF ACT 2???  Friends, I don’t know the answers to these questions because I’ve never seen a movie before. But I know girls do actually do that thing where they try to sleep with guys they’ve already been with to try to keep their number down.  That’s why I recommend getting to them early, at like 11 or 12, that way every time they get horny your peen gets grandfathered in.

*Bosnak is a former television producer whose claim to fame was turning her $20,000 credit card debt (result of her addiction to designer clothes) into a website called SaveKaryn.com, where she solicited donations to help pay it off.

Around The Web