‘Bane Outtakes’ Batman Parody Finally Brings The Bane Rap Freestyle We’ve Always Needed

Nerdcore tipped us to this ingenious dubbing of scenes from The Dark Knight Rises by Auralnauts, which they’re calling “Bane Outtakes”. It starts out a bit slow, setting up this version of Bane’s obsession with breakfast foods and healthy eating. The first scene that made me laugh started at 2:30, and from there on out it was pure gold. If you don’t mind seeing spoilers (the biggest spoilers coming at 3:10 and 6:40), this is well worth watching for the Bane rap freestyle and Batman’s traveling music. And hearing Bane say, “Toasty!” was a magnificent callback to the scene before it.

If nothing else, check out Bane’s rap freestyle starting at 5:00. It may replaced Brett Gelman’s intentionally-bad “I Am Bane” (NSFW) from his podcast (also NSFW) as my all-time favorite Bane rap freestyle.

I’m Bane, yes, that’s my name.
When you hear the name Bane, I guarantee the pain.
I’m coming after you, Bruce Wayne.
I’m stronger, smarter, and clinically insane.

I’m Bane, yes, that’s my name.
Bruce Wayne and the Batman are totally the same.
I broke his back mortal comBAT smack,
then I cracked my ’28 Krug champagne.

I’m Bane, yes, it’s a shame.
I declare martial law, and you all complain!
I laugh when you ask why I wear the mask.
I’ll explain. It’s because I’m Bane, yes, that’s my name.
You say it too much, the name becomes inane.
Of course! Some think my plan lacks gain.
If you say it too my face, I’ll crash your plane.

When I say “No” you say “Survivors”.

That’s pretty fantastic, but Brett Gelman’s version included the line, “My favorite actor… is Billy Zane.” It’s hard to top that. Also, could Bane rap freestyles become a thing? If planking can be a thing, why not Yo Reckoning Raps?

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