Let The ‘Deadpool’ Infomercial Sell You A Shiny Set Of Profanity-Filled Promises

Hot on the profanity-laden heels of the newest Deadpool trailer (and the deeper implications), it turns out that the 12 Days of Deadpool never stopped. The Merc with a Mouth’s self-delivered PR onslaught continues with a new gig at Empire magazine. He nabbed control of the February issue, and he’s taking his job seriously with this infomercial. Dead serious, in fact. Deadpool explains how the staff is “locked in my crawl space, desperately longing for the sweet release of death.”

From there, Deadpool launches into a dirty little rant about what the issue contains. He mentions do-it-yourself recipes and photos of himself banging “a weeping Kevin Sorbo … and that’s not even the centerfold.” Something tells me that poor Hercules may end up getting hammered through an endless supply of fourth walls (while loving every moment). All of these details arrive with the promise of “backstage passes” to Deadpool’s tush and his country tune, “You’re Crying Hard, And I’m Hard Because You’re Crying.”

Who could refuse an offer like this one? Not even Don Vito Corleone could say no. By the way, the Empire cover looks fantastic. If this movie flops at the box office, it won’t be for lack of trying.

(Via Empire)