Welcome to Reality TV Roundup — a quick look at some of the reality TV-centric stories that have recently popped up across the fine, old Interwebs. Click away, my couch potato friends. But before you do…
SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! One more time: SPOILER ALERT. If you watch any competition shows, the latest elimination for each show is probably revealed in the text below. The hope is that, if you missed this week’s program and would rather clear out your DVR than watch the episode, you can get a quick hit here. But don’t come crying to me if you find out something you didn’t want to know. You’ve been warned. Also note: lots of non-competition reality info lurks below, too.
COMPETITION REALITY SHOWS
THE BACHELORETTE
“The Bachelorette”‘s James talks about protein, Brooks, Superstorm Sandy and science.
This week, the bachelors wear Speedos and hula hoop and stuff. It’s cute, kind of.
BIG BROTHER
Meet the new “Big Brother” hamsters! We mean, contestants!
SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE
Meet our top twenty dancers in a tricked up, kinda ’80s looking photo gallery!
Here’s a recap of the episode in which everyone walks the green mile and some people cry and it’s a little sad.
PROJECT RUNWAY
Tim Gunn is going to be hanging out with the judges during the runway show — and snitching on the designers. We love it!
NON-COMPETITION REALITY TV SHOWS
THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY
Caroline’s attempt to broker peace between Teresa and Melissa were just a waste of time, it seems, because these women can’t even behave themselves at a kiddie birthday party.
MISC.
Ed Hardy tells us what we already know — Jon Gosselin helped destroy the brand by wearing it.
Melinda Newman and I debate whether or not anyone is ever on “The Bachelorette” or “The Bachelor” for “the right reasons.” We disagree, but I’ll say I’m more of a romantic than she is.
Paula Deen gets fired from The Food Network for using racial slurs, and butter lovers and heart surgeons everywhere mourn.
Flavor Flav gets “Couples Therapy” and we learn Joe Francis is just as much of a jerk as we thought he was.
Buzz Aldrin hangs out with the nerds on “The Big Brain Theory: Pure Genius” as they face their final challenge.
Valerie Harper’s slow death will be the focus of a TV special. Yeah, keep it classy, NBC.
Nik Wallenda prepares to walk across the Grand Canyon. On a tightrope. Yeah. I’m nervous just thinking about it, aren’t you?
Bret Michaels suffers injuries in a Mississipi bus crash. But don’t worry. He’ll survive to fix your RV!
Okay, that North West baby name thing has to be a joke, right? Apparently her family doesn’t dig it, either.