A Shame There is No Popcorn to Go With This

04.09.09 9 years ago 26 Comments

After the runaway success of Marty B’s blog post on ladyfarts, a few readers noticed a subsequent entry in which he proclaims the tight end combo of he and Jason Witten to be “Rice and Beans.” Well, they weren’t the only ones. Execs in the television industry were piqued with the possibilities of a serial cop drama.

Coming this fall to FOX, following the two-hour block of Cops on Saturday night:

Jason Witten is… KENNY ARROZ!

Martellus Bennett is… JEROME FRIJOLES!

Together they are:

Set in the crime hotbed that is Dallas (actually filmed in Oklahoma City to save money)

Archived footage of the late Tex Schramm as…THE CHIEF!

“Listen here, Rice and Beans, I know you get results, but I’ve had it up to here with your unorthodox tactics. You scared Miles Austin halfway to death!”

Ed Werder is … THE MOLE!

“C’mon Rice. You know the department loves you. What’s a little info just this once?”

Tony Romo is… VICE SQUAD DETECTIVE ALEJANDRO!

“I am only in drag to ceetch dees perverts!”

Marion Barber is … MARION BARBER!

“Whatever. Just came to this show for the groupie ass. I don’t play no bitch-ass characters.”

This fall, RICE & BEANS. They’re gonna serve up a platter…OF ASS WHIPPINGS!

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