Men Who Catcall Have Tiny Balls, According To Science

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Catcallers and guys with obnoxiously loud motorcycles — what do they have in common? Well, they’re probably the same person, and that person has tiny balls. A new study found that overcompensating Howler monkeys with louder roars have smaller testicles “and by extension, less sperm for reproduction,” according to U.S. News and World Report. Well, that explains Guy Fieri.

“In evolutionary terms, all males strive to have as many offspring as they can, but when it comes to reproduction you can’t have everything,” said lead researcher Jacob Dunn of the University of Cambridge’s Division of Biological Anthropology.

“When males invest in large bodies, bright colors, or weaponry such as horns or long canines, they are unable to also invest in reproductive traits,” Dunn added. (Via)

Howler monkeys only weigh about 15 pounds, but they’re one of the loudest living creatures on the planet, with a horrible noise that can be heard from three miles away. They’re the construction workers of the animal kingdom.

“It may be that investment in developing a large vocal organ and roaring is so costly,” Dunn said, “that there is simply not enough energy left to invest in testes.” Sorry, every shock jock. Monkeys’ balls, what can’t they teach us?

(Via U.S. News and World Report)