At about precisely the moment we finally got the hang of ordering Dominos via Twitter, the pizza giant unleashed even easier albeit more dangerous ordering technology. It’s a new app that automatically orders what you want “without a single click.”
The app launched on Wednesday and it’s pretty simple. You download the app and as soon as your belly starts grumbling, you open the app. That’s all. When you open the app, a 10 second timer appears and if you don’t cancel the timer, your order is sent.
This all comes as really good news for butts, who’ve been seeking to not be moved ever since we started sitting on them. The advent of touchscreen technology led to countless failed attempts at contacting strangers but these failures have only fueled the fight for posterior independence. Now our butts will exercise true autonomy as they cross the barrier from inside our pants to the wallets inside our pockets.