With the news that a federal judge in Hawaii is putting the kibosh on President Trump’s second and not at all xenophobic attempt on a travel ban, people are taking to twitter to call for a boycott on travel to The Aloha State and to insist that they definitely didn’t want to go to Hawaii anyway.
And why would they? It’s literal Hell on Earth. Check out this patriot, who canceled a two week trip:
Or this person whose eyes are open. Why would we want to travel to Hawaii, the ugliest place on the planet? Or trust a judge who graduated from Harvard, the dumbest school anyone can think of?
And then there’s this guy who suggests we all go to Florida instead of Hawaii. Which is smart because Tampa is more beautiful than the ugly beaches of Hawaii could ever be. And what about Mar-a-Lago? One fancy dinner and you might even be given a cabinet position!
Look, there are lots of places in America much prettier than Hawaii. Instead of going to a place filled with lush forests, brilliant blue water, and tons of tropical flowers, why not go on a Segway tour of Cleveland? What we’re saying is that there are lots of places nicer to vacation than Hawaii, guys. Have you fully seen Omaha yet?
So to make us all feel better about having to cancel our trips to the “alo-ha-ppens…to be filled with losers!” state, we compiled this list of the absolute UGLIEST places to see in the dreary island chain. Seriously, don’t waste your time!
1. Na Pali Coast State Park
It’s a good thing this disgusting state park is filled with cliffs because if I had to visit this light-filled paradise, I’d jump off them! Seriously: I would rather be blinded with a hot poker than ever look upon this horrible place.