This Guy’s 50-State Mini-Golf Road Trip Is The Stuff Of Summer Dreams

What’s the best summer activity? It’s definitely not swimming at the local public pool — kids pee in that water, man! And forget the lame at-home fireworks displays (no matter how cool it is to shoot your hard-earned money directly out of a Roman Candle and into the pond across the street).

Mini-golf is where it’s really at. It’s like golfing…only miniature-sized. You don’t need to worry about selecting the correct club, because there’s only one. The game is way abbreviated, meaning that you don’t have to stand in the hot sun for sixteen hours while your buddy shoots his way into every single sand trap and water hazard on the course. And you get to play through fun stuff, like windmills and scary caves! (And if any of this golf slang is wrong, it’s because the author has literally never played regular-sized golf, ever. Don’t hate.)

Reddit user dangermoth agrees with our Official Uproxx Opinion on minigolf. He’s currently in the middle of a fantastic, two-month long roadtrip through all 50 states. The goal: to play his way through every state’s most popular/highest-rated mini-golf course.

Dangermoth, whose real name is Dan Caprera, recently shared a highlight reel of his favorite courses on Imgur. From Missouri’s Hollywood-themed “Shoot for the Stars” course (“complete with voice activated animatronics”) to Texas’ 54-hole TopGolf Dallas (“If ever there was a way to go over the top in mini golf designing, this place was close”), Caprera’s photos are enough to inspire you to put down your phone and pick up your putter.

Caprera is also documenting his progress on his blog, which he calls a “handy guide to the best miniature golf courses in the nation.” As of yesterday’s post, his latest round played was in New York, at the popular Pier 25 Mini Golf course. The “pretty simplistic, low upkeep course” offered Caprera a fantastic view of downtown Manhattan, but at a cost:

It was also one of the most popular, highly attended courses I’ve been to on my journey – I was stuck for over an hour behind a particularly obnoxious couple who kept making out on the course after they sunk every single damn hole, oblivious to the fact that I was right behind them waiting for my turn to putt. Oblivious to the heartrending hatred and jealousy I felt watching their pure and untainted love bloom into a chrysanthemum. When will my chrysanthemum bloom? When?

Just as soon as you find a special someone who shares a similar love of the mini greens, Dan. It will be a match made on the astroturf.

Check out Caprera’s Imgur gallery, below: