I’ve never had a Shamrock Shake. For years, I’ve heard how good they are and have been chastised by both friends and strangers — strangers who felt compelled to speak out in the shake’s defense when I declined to add one to my order — for missing out on one of life’s greatest, greenest pleasures. But that all changed yesterday.
With the announcement that Burger King had launched their own riff on the famed minty concoction, it was decided that I would launch an investigation into whether BK’s Mint Oreo Shake (formerly the Oreo Irish Mint Shake) was truly the Shamrock Shake killer we’ve been waiting for. A daunting task, but one I felt sure I could handle. After all, I’ve eaten 12 pounds of candy, made the chocolate pasta from Elf, and drank a full gallon of Egg Nog since I’ve been at UPROXX, so what could a few harmless seasonal shakes do to me? Nothing, that’s what.
So I called a Lyft (because don’t use Uber!), locked in my coordinates (a foolish task as you will soon learn), and embraced the green minty future.