Here’s Your Wonderfully Confusing List Of Each State’s Valentine’s Day Related Google Searches

This is a map showing the Valentine’s Day gifts each state Googles more often than other states. A lot of the stuff on the map is pretty normal; flower bouquet, box of chocolates, couples massage, flower delivery, that kind of stuff. Other stuff on the list is not quite as normal so we’re going to parcel a few of them out for you!

Let’s have a look:

The largest and most eye catching oddity is definitely lobster tails in Montana. Don’t get us wrong, lobster tails are delicious and should not be taken for granted. But why lobster tails in Montana on Valentine’s Day? Of course they’re an aphrodisiac, but if they have to travel very far they might make more than just your loins burn. (Your butt, we’re talking about your butt, in case the well-traveled crustacean makes you sick.)

Okay, moving on. Texas! Har-har we get it, everything’s bigger in Texas. But come on, “Plus-Sized Lingerie” … it’s just too cliché. Is Google analytics powered by corny regional slogans? Anyway, this seems like a slippery slope. Ordering lingerie online is risky and you definitely wouldn’t want to insult your girlfriend or wife by wrongly ordering gigantic undies. Or would you? Oh Texas we can’t stay mad at you!

How about this one, “tandem bicycles,” in Iowa? What’s up with that? Are there secret romantic, whimsical bike paths in Iowa that no one knows about? Also, tandem bikes are kind of expensive. That might even be considered a lavish gift. We’re definitely not mad about it, more confused.

There’s plenty to think about here so, digest this thing as thoroughly as you see fit. You may even learn a thing or two.