‘Furious 7’ Scientifically Proven To Be The Fastest, Most Furious Film Ever

You may have noticed that the Fast & Furious movies are only getting faster and more furious, but Bloomberg Business has decided to take a break from pushing pencils to quantify exactly how much faster and furiouser Furious 7 is, and surprise surprise, it’s the fastest and furiousest yet.

The results prove that Furious 7 is a high-water mark for both vehicular travel (49 minutes) and physical punishment (33 minutes). The categories aren’t mutually exclusive, with some drive time overlapping with moments of violence. The other six movies, as you see below, are moderately less fast and significantly less furious.

They even backed it up with a handy chart:

The amount of “fast” happening had stayed pretty consistent across the series, but we’re seeing huge increases in “furious,” with things ratcheting up for Fast and Furious and continuing to get ever more brawntastic with the addition of The Rock in Fast Five.

It’s not just about being fast, though. Amongst other things, Bloomberg took the time to calculate all the positives from the series, like the number of times the word “family” is spoken, the number of BBQs hosted, and the amount of Grace recited. For your information, Fast & Furious 6 and Furious 7 were the family-est films of the bunch, with 11 and eight mentions, respectively. That’s shocking, considering that Furious 7 featured a tear-jerking homage to Paul Walker at the end.

Now we just need to find out how many times Vin Diesel offered people Corona. We’re gonna need a bigger chart.

[Bloomberg Business]