John Wick 2 is set to open in a few weeks. The studio behind the film, Lionsgate, has already released posters and trailers and done all the other things studios usually do to promote action movies about Keanu Reeves shooting people in night clubs and ballrooms and such, so now they’re trying something different. Above, please find a two-minute supercut of Keanu Reeves killing Russian gangsters in the first movie, set to Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture.”
Why is the studio promoting John Wick 2 with a two-minute supercut of Keanu Reeves killing Russian gangsters in the first movie, set to Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture”? Hmm. Not important, really. What’s important is that it exists now and you might as well watch it if you’ve made it this far. Like, what else were you gonna do with the next two minutes? Nothing that great, probably. No offense or anything, but if you’re just clicking around the internet and reading two paragraph descriptions of Keanu Reeves murder supercuts, you might as well just hit play. I’m not even sure why you even read any of this, to be honest. The odds were pretty low at the outset of me saying anything more interesting than what’s in that video. You shouldn’t have read any of it. This was 60 seconds you’ll never get back. You really need to start managing your time better, Greg.
(This last sentence works best if your name is Greg.)