Finally, The Rock Will Debut His Official YouTube Channel

Quick, what do you want more than anything else in the world?

No, not $50 million. How would that even work? You think I — someone who writes on the internet — have that kind of scratch to toss around? No chance. And for the record, if you’re gonna request outlandish sums of money, you gotta start way higher than that. Think this through. Anyway, guess again.

Well, for the love of G-… no, it’s not a time machine made out of Slim Jims. What kind of guess is that? Because you’d probably travel back in time to kill Hitler and then get hungry and eat your time machine and then what do you got? Indigestion and a lifetime stuck in Nazi Germany. You are terrible at this. One more guess.

No, not a… wait a second. Yes! That’s correct! An official YouTube channel from Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, movie star, television star, professional wrestler, and… other things! And to promote said channel, debuting July 18, The Rock has posted this trailer. It’s quite something. As you can see.

Anyway, this is really just a wonderful development because it brings us one step closer to a world where idiot YouTube commenters leave idiotic comments under his first video and he gets all their IP addresses and hunts them all down one-by-one in every YouTube video after that. About time.

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