People love watching famous people accept trophies. So, every so often, The Huffington Post’s Chris Rosen and Uproxx’s Mike Ryan will speculate about these trophies and which famous person might win one. It will be fun. Let’s talk some trophies! Today, we preview the 72nd annual Golden Globes.
Mike: So, Chris, first of all, this is our first Trophy Talk at Uproxx. I just feel I should point that out for people wondering what all of this nonsense is about. In a nutshell: We talk about famous people winning awards for their work in film. It is nonsense, but it’s also fun. It is fun, right?
Chris: It’s fun for us, at least. Plus, as we’ve said before, everyone loves trophies. Most people love talking. This feature is a no-brainer.
Mike: Speaking of fun … the Golden Globes are this weekend. On a scale of 1-10, how excited are you for the Golden Globes?
Chris: I’m simmering at about a “3” right now, mostly only because of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. There’s just no oomph to this year’s crop, is there? Not to say I don’t love the movies — yay, Boyhood, Selma, Birdman and, really, many of the other nominees — but it kind of feels anticlimactic. Last year, we had a three movie race between American Hustle, Gravity and 12 Years a Slave, and each had passionate defenders and detractors. This year, it’s Birdman, Boyhood, Imitation Game and Selma, and everyone is kind of like [shrug emoticon].
Mike: Yeah, and I still believe that Selma is the most important movie of 2014 and is a no-brianer Best Picture winner … yet it keeps not winning anything. Or, in the case of the Producers Guild awards, it doesn’t even get nominated. The excuse seems to still be that not enough voters have seen Selma, but WE saw Selma on November 17th and WE don’t have a vote on anything really. If we can finagle our way into a screening almost two months ago, I don’t understand how voters haven’t yet. Having said all of that. Also: Amy Poehler and Tina Fey are really good at being Golden Globe hosts.
Chris: As an ardent Selma supporter and actual fan of the movie, the idea that it hasn’t rated anywhere — not with the Producers Guild or Screen Actors Guild, not with the American Cinema Editors or America Society of Cinematographers — is disconcerting. The party line is that Paramount didn’t get screeners out, yada yada yada. But, c’mon. It’s Jan. 8. Oscar voting closes soon. Selma has been out in theaters for two weeks in Los Angeles, New York, D.C. and Atlanta. People have seen this movie. Why they aren’t reacting to it the way literally everyone we know has is … odd. But maybe there is no greater conspiracy. Maybe Selma will win at the Globes and then grab a host of Oscar nods next week? That’s what I’m hoping, but it’s annoying. I can only imagine how Ava DuVernay feels.
Mike: And let’s not forget that Selma is still sitting at 100 percent on Rotten Tomatoes. One hundred percent! It’s a movie that everyone collectively loves, yet the awards are going to the movies that we just don’t like as much. And do you know what excuse I HATE? The, “Well, 12 Years a Slave won last year and it had similar themes of social and racial injustice. Baloney. And if that’s really a reason, that’s vile.
Chris: I have very little faith in the old guard members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences to the point that I’m not even sure many even watch the movies they wind up picking. (It often feels like a herd mentality: “Do I really need to watch Blue Jasmine since I know Cate Blanchett is gonna win? Nah, I’ll just vote for her.”) But that line of thinking even feels beneath them. Like, a legitimate “wut.” So let’s pretend for a minute that these people aren’t monsters. If anything, Selma seems to be going the way of Zero Dark Thirty, a late-arriving entry into an already set race that weathers outside attacks from political forces to make it appear illegitimate. Zero Dark Thirty still got that Best Picture nomination, but it didn’t win. Maybe Selma just came on the scene too late to overcome that kind of storm.
Mike: Zero Dark Thirty is a great comparison. It got killed for being “pro-torture,” which it wasn’t. Now Selma is in hot water for alleged inaccuracies with LBJ’s portrayal. It’s really disheartening that of all of the things that Selma stands for, this is what’s getting the most attention. Anyway, before we end here, let’s do some Globes predictions for a few major categories. And as we know, a Globe win usually comes down to who kissed enough Hollywood Foreign Press Association ass.
Chris: Predictions! I love that stuff.
I’m gonna start with Musical or Comedy, where Birdman should win going away. That means Michael Keaton will probably get a Globe too.
For Best Actor in a Drama, give me Benedict Cumberbatch. He’s British.
I’m going with Julianne Moore for Maps to the Stars in the Musical or Comedy actress category. That movie literally ONLY came out in L.A. for Globes voters.
Plus, giving Moore a win in that category frees the Globes up to give Jennifer Aniston Best Actress in a Motion Picture Drama for Cake.
Mike: So, for Best Performance in a Motion Picture – Drama, I’m going with an upset: Jake Gyllenhaal for Nightcrawler.
I agree, Michael Keaton will win for Best Performance in a Motion Picture – Musical or Comedy.
For Best Actress in a Motion Picture Drama, I also agree it will be Jennifer Aniston because the HFPA will not be able to resist give her a trophy and she has been campaigning really hard. (even though Cake is not a good movie).
I like your theory about Moore winning for Maps to the Stars instead of Still Alice, but I’m going to go with Emily Blunt for Into the Woods. (Boy, Actress for Comedy is a crazy category this year.)
Chris: Supporting seems a little more set:
J.K. Simmons has to win for Whiplash.
And then Patricia Arquette for Boyhood. But! I wouldn’t be surprised if Emma Stone steals the Globe from Arquette owing to the fact that Emma Stone is really famous.
Mike: Agree, J.K. Simmons will win for Whiplash and it is very much deserved.
I’m going to pick another upset for supporting actress: Jessica Chastain for A Most Violent Year.
Do we both agree that Richard Linklater will win Best Director for Boyhood?
Chris: Is Ben Affleck nominated this year? No? Angelina Jolie? Oh, not her either. So maybe Richard Linklater, but in no reality could I ever imagine Richard Linklater interacting with the Hollywood Foreign Press Association. So I’ll go with Alejandro Iñárritu, because Birdman had the most nominations and they liked that movie.
Mike: And last, who do you have for Best Motion Picture — Drama and Best Motion Picture — Comedy or Musical?
Against everything I just wrote above, I’m going with Selma for the former and Birdman for the latter.
Chris: Definitely Birdman for Comedy.
And you know what? I think Selma will win too. This is the place where Argo got a perceived boost to win Best Picture and despite the goofiness of this show and voting body, they know how to create a moment. Selma would go a long way to making this year’s Globes feel relevant. Why would they pass that chance up when it also comes in service of rewarding a fantastic movie?
Mike: Hm … so maybe not so anticlimactic after all?