Music

Ted Cruz Might Not Be The Zodiac Killer, But He Could Very Well Be The Lead Singer From Stryper

Rumors of Ted Cruz being the Zodiac Killer might just be a bit of fun the Internet is having these days, but another option has appeared. If you travel back to the height of hair metal in the 1980s, you’ll come upon a strange anomaly among the bands singing about partying, strippers, and Lucifer. You’ll come upon Stryper, a Christian hair metal band that actually came upon some popularity during their age and a little bit of respect. Picture Creed, but with bumblebee colors and wild hair.

Then while you’re at it, picture Ted Cruz as the lead singer. It isn’t too hard, just look:

That’s right, Ted Cruz and Stryper front man Michael Sweet look eerily similar. It’s like Ted Cruz traveled back after losing this election, slapped on a few layers of makeup and let his hair grow out in order to lead the greatest Christian metal band of the ’80s. Frightening stuff.

Michael Sweet is aware of the similarity, posting this Tweet and joking about having to postpone his tour. That’s right, Stryper is on tour.

The Daily Dot notes that certain folks on Stryper’s fan page did not take too kindly to the comparisons — or the amount of people that kept posting the comparison and commenting on it — prompting a very desperate response:

Ok, we’ve all now seen at least a dozen times the Ted Cruz looks like Michael in one photo from 1983. I’ve been tagged, had it forwarded to me and have deleted countless postings on the Stryper page that I am webmaster for. First, stop it! Second, it’s making fun of the band and my best friends. Third, it’s making fun of anyone who dares be a fan (in other words….YOU). I don’t like ANY of that! I discussed this with Michael the day he posted it and the only reason he posted was because of the free press that comes from it. He didn’t like the post either and removed the original persons name from it. It has now grown to the point of being ridiculous. So, can I ask everyone to not post it anymore and to move on? Can we all agree on that? Can I get a like or comment of agreement on this? Sorry, it isn’t funny anymore. (Never was).

I’m afraid that anything with Stryper is typically kinda funny. Or hair metal in general. Besides, just listen to Michael Sweet singing in this classic Stryper video. If you listen closely and think about it, he almost sounds a bit like Ted Cruz.

(Via The Daily Dot / Michael Boulerice)

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