If you’ve ever watched America’s self-appointed front lawn monitor Bill O’Reilly’s show, you know that he’s unhealthily obsessed with Beyonce. Specifically, the noted felafel fetishist thinks that Beyonce’s provocative songs and videos are enticing the kids out there to do the sex, resulting in teen pregnancies and welfare moms and whatnot. O’Reilly has zero evidence to back this up, btw — it’s all based on his supreme know-it-allness. But who’s counting?!
Of late, he’s particularly had his tighty whities in a wad about Beyonce’s video for Petition — the song Vin Diesel likes to video himself dancing to — because it depicts Beyonce and Jay-Z having married sex. This, of course, makes Jon Stewart giddy and giggly.
“That song is about two married, incredibly successful entrepreneurs with a child in a stable relationship enjoying one of the sacraments of marriage in the back of a luxurious automobile,” Stewart explained. “If that’s not a conservative utopia, I don’t know what is.”
Here’s part one…
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And here’s part two…
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